I asked Seth if he wanted to take a nap. He’d been sitting next to me on the couch for 20 min instead of roaming the house like a caged animal as he’s prone to do lately. He simply nodded, unwilling to take his passy out to communicate verbally.
It’s not even 10am and my busy 1 1/2 year old who gave up his morning nap months ago happily wilted into my arms so I could carry him up to bed.
We’re sick. Oh, we are so sick. I mean, we’ll live, and we’re actually on the mend, but we were really sick this time. Coughing, green snot, fevers, parched lips – the whole nine yards.
And the worst part? I feel guilty about it.
See, when you put as much passion as I do into nourishing your family well, and for the most part enjoy really good health, you kind of link the two in your head – we’re healthy ’cause we take good care of ourselves. It’s actually a pretty accurate conclusion. Except it overlooks one major factor….
We live in a broken world.
We can — and should — be good stewards of our time, our health, our resources, but in the end, failure is still so often a part of the picture.
And then, if you’re like me, you want to take the blame. So on top of sinus infections we’ve been fighting for 5 weeks (which is probably more the fault of a mild winter’s failure to kill a lot of bugs than my irresponsibility) I’ve spent my time in bed wondering if I’d been more diligent to give my kids yogurt every day and to eat more sauerkraut whether all this would happen.
And isn’t that rather presumptuous of me? Here we are in a fallen world and I think I can reverse the direction of the universe armed with my little jars of yogurt and sauerkraut?
So, I’m trying to refocus my perspective today. To transfer my hope from myself (who can fail even when I’m doing my best because of that whole fallen world thing) to God (Who, even in a fallen world, can allow us to rise above the brokenness with an eternal perspective).
- I’m counting my Thousand Gifts to bring my attitude back in alignment.
- I’m trying really hard to ignore the mess throughout the house so I can get the rest I need to heal.
- We’re eating soups made with homemade stock, and avoiding sugar as much as possible.
- I’m looking at my Home Management Binder to discern where I can cut back so I can get the rest I need in the coming month to kick this thing once and for all.
Have you experienced failure in the past week? Have you been down on yourself? I hope not, but if you have, please learn from my mistakes. Be reminded that it’s a fallen world, and our only true hope is not in our ability to preform, but in God’s ability to redeem – sometimes in the now, definitely in Eternity.
Hope your day is filled with spring sunshine and hope,