It may surprise you that I still struggle with anxiety. After all, I experienced a huge deliverance in this area. My mind underwent a massive overhaul. My thought patterns were in some ways completely reversed! I occasionally have flash backs to how I used to think about a situation and it almost always makes me laugh out loud with joy. I’m free!!!
But I still have stress in my life. Some of it is natural and part of how we are wired and what motivates us. But God is still working on me to rid me of anxiety based on lies. When I look back over the past 6 years I see He did a huge work in releasing me from what strangers thought of me. Then the lessons moved closer to home and I had to learn to make decisions that were best for me and my little family, and diminish the impact of the voices that had always been pivotal in my decision making process – that of extended family and those I respected. It was part of growing up and learning to go to God and my own husband when making choices for my own family. Then the Lord began to work even deeper in my heart – a process that I’m right in the middle of even as I write this series – discovering the false expectations I enforce on myself and the lies I believe about how I relate to Him. The work keeps getting deeper till I am at the point of addressing the core lies I believe about God. Oh, how I want His truth to invade my life, to the deepest, darkest corners of my heart. I have tasted freedom and I want to fully embrace it!
Do I ever experience the chest pains that sent me to the ER? Yes. But get this – after the Lord healed me, they went from several times a week to a few times a year. Yes, I can literally count on one hand the times in the past few years when stress has gotten me to the point of triggering the chest pains again. And now that I know what they are, I don’t freak out, but take them as a signal that I’ve been believing a lie and need to cleanse my mind with truth. I go to the scriptures – Psalms, Proverbs and Isaiah are favorites for regaining perspective on God’s heart and my place in the big picture. I talk with Jeremy. I humble myself before God and repent and ask for help. And even when the pain grips me again, I rejoice, because it always reminds me that I’m changed and free.
I still suffer from insomnia occasionally, but that is largely due to the fact that I’m a very driven, passionate person. I keep myself awake at nights planning productivity and efficiency in every area of my life so I can accomplish my massive to-do lists. See? I still have problems. As I joked to a friend the other day, “I probably should be on medication some days!” But I know what to do and where to go when I’m struggling. So even though life isn’t perfect (news flash – it ain’t gonna be till we get to heaven) I can experience a taste of glory here and now because of the freedom Christ offers His children. Press in and find that joy, friend. There’s nothing like it. No drug, panacea, distraction, relationship, comfort food, material possession, or outward destination is going to give you a lasting fix. Jesus is the one who will set you free. I bless His name.
This is the final post in a series on overcoming anxiety. I hope that my honesty in sharing my story has inspired you that you, too, can find freedom in this area. If you have any further questions about my experiences, or would like to talk or pray with someone as you journey to freedom, please don’t hesitate to email me: firstname.lastname@example.org
Read the rest of the series…
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 1 – Vice of Fear
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 2 – Glimpse of Hope
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 3 – How bad was it? And have you got one, too?
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 4 – The Physical Fix – Are Drugs the Answer?
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 5 – The Mental Fix – Quick and Easy?
My Anxiety Disorder: Part 6 – The Spiritual Fix – A New Perspective, Please!