I wanted a hired hand. The children outnumbered the adults and the number of arms I had. The laundry was a living thing, threatening and growing. What to feed all these little animals was a constant question. And I had nearly lost the ability to engage in anything extra-curricular, like cleaning the shower or reading a book.
I found myself almost daily fantasizing about hired help. We couldn’t afford it, but still, I’d imagine what life would be like if I had someone to help me with a deep cleaning project (there was one calling to me from every room), do a bit of ironing, or just hang out with my kids so I could get something done without an interruption every 30 seconds.
This desire morphed into what I felt was a justifiable need while I was at Relevant. I met so many wonderful, type-A woman like myself who were doing it all – but freely admitted it was with help. Woman I respected like Crystal Paine and Angie Toplin said it was one of the best decisions they ever made. I headed home with the goal of figuring out a way to get my hands on my own personal Cinderella, feeling it was essential to my calling as a wife, mother, and blogger.
I brainstormed with my roomie on the long drive home about how I could pull this off, but my quest took a turn when she asked one little question. She wasn’t critical, just curious –
“Why?” Why did I feel I needed help?
I quickly filled her in on all of the above – I couldn’t do everything I was called to do on my own, and all the most productive woman at the conference encouraged delegation and getting help. But as I spoke, I heard tones of justification. Suddenly I began to wonder if this really was a valid need, or a selfish desire I was justifying with all my lofty goals.
It was the very next week that the Lord began revealing to me some pretty thick veins of pride running through my life - pride concerning my blogging goals, my household goals, my personal goals – pride was everywhere! And pride, get this, was at the root of my desire for a helping hand. “If I just had help, then I could do it all!” And doing it all was what my prideful heart wanted most.
That’s when I let go of my Cinderella Dream. That’s when I saw it for what it was – a selfish, prideful desire, and began to trust the Lord that He would show me the way through all my desires and goals and dreams, and give me the strength to accomplish what He has called me to.
It’s been a journey, but I want to share with you what I have learned. About the Art of Sacrifice, The Beauty of Prioritizing, and, a Trick that’s actually made me feel as though I have gained an Extra Hand around the house (not to mention a large does of Peace of Mind). If you feel like you never will get it all done or make it through the challenging season you’re in, I want to encourage you. God will show you the way. And I’m gonna make room for you on the stepping stones I’ve found along the way…